An irrelevant dud

"Elizabethtown"
Starring: Orlando Bloom, Kirsten Dunst, Susan Sarandon, Alec Baldwin
2 1/2 stars out of 4


When someone is talking about cinema miscalculations, they’re mentioning failures, fiascos, and total disappointments. “Elizabethtown” is one of those miscalculations; it misfires on so many levels it turns agonizing to keep watching. Director Cameron Crowe, who is responsible for such titles as “Jerry Maguire, “Almost Famous, and “Vanilla Sky,” has created a collage of all different movies with “Elizabethtown.”

Orlando Bloom who can finally step out of his routine role as an elf, or swashbuckling hero, had the chance to turn a corner with this role. Bloom plays Drew Baylor, the kind of person whose cell phone is there life. Drew works for a shoe-making company in Oregon, he has created a new model called Spasmodica, and Drew’s boss quickly informs him that his model will cost the company 972 million dollars, along with Drew being fired. Drew looks to suicide in a comical way as he attaches a knife to a workout bike by controling how fast the knife will go once the machine is moving, kinda funny. A mild interruption arises when Drew’s sister calls him with bad news, “Dad died,” she emotionally exclaims.

A trip to Elizabethtown, Kentucky is now in the cards for Drew, he must go there for the first time to visit his Dad’s side of the family, and convince them into cremating his Dad.
After hopping on a Redeye, Drew remains weak, tired, frustrated and the last thing he wants is interaction. On the flight he meets a quirky stewardess named Claire Colburn, (Kirsten Dunst) she asks way to many questions for the emotionally ailing Drew to even fathom. Claire speaks in an eager language, full of advice, sayings, and perky ballyhoo. After the flight, they part ways and she gives him directions to Elizabethtown as if it’s the center of the world and it’ll be easy to find, but it’s not.

Drew finally arrives and breathes in the world that his father loved. Elizabethtown isn’t just a city; it’s full of simple pleasures, where a man can enjoy his family, a city full of proximity, tradition, and probably not many 4 star hotels. During his stay, Drew makes discoveries about his father and his family that are mostly positive. He goes through all night conversations with Claire, who gives him insight, and they form a relationship that is too confusing to define.

“Elizabethtown” is Cameron Crowe’s experience, something like this supposedly happened to him, and that’s why we trust him so much with the story. There isn’t much emotional activity going on here, Bloom isn’t bad in the role, but he’s plain, you would think a better chemistry would form between him and Claire, their relationship doesn’t extend beyond the word “cute.” Although there are some positives, the dry humor, the exceptional soundtrack and the acting, the plot doesn’t turn out challenging enough. Drew is sent on a mission to his father’s hometown to decide whether to bury him or cremate him, he meets the other side of the family along with Claire, and he somehow finds emotional stability by acting cute, friendly, and confusing. All of that wasn’t enough for me, I wanted personal victories for Drew, I wanted more then what the end had to offer, these characters deserved more.

Instead we are brought along for this supposed emotional journey, which left me unsatisfied, semi-interested, and disappointed. Crowe is so good with simple stories of love, families, hope and loss. He falls flat on his face here and hopefully he will learn from the shortcomings of this and move on. The small town USA theme isn’t captured too well, along with Crowe’s views on emotional security saved by a young woman; we saw that in the fabulous “Garden State.”

The cast didn’t gel well at all; Crowe usually gives his performing cast wealthy screen time and moments but ceases to capture the talent that he had on his side. From here I don’t know where Crowe stands, he had 2 gems with “Jerry Maguire” and “Almost Famous”, and before “Elizabethtown”, “Vanilla Sky” wasn’t received well by critics, even though I liked it. Films are definitely not made for the critics, Crowe for one definitely know this, but when he pitches two donuts to the critics in 4 years he must be worried no matter what anyone says about him. Even though it’s only October, I am worried that the outcome for the whole 2005 movie season will not even equal the parts of last December. CAN’T WAIT FOR JARHEAD!


NOTE- 2 1/2 stars is bad for a Cameron Crowe movie.